Gabrielle Deydier

Apologies for the lack of postings as of late: - I gave birth to our fourth son a couple of months ago.  Bilal is obviously delighted and wanting more.  I have no reason to say no: - I always eat sensibly and therefore have no worries about what effect this will have on my impossibly dainty figure.

I have been asked a few times what I think about Gabrielle Deydier, the supposed Frenchwoman denouncing "grossophobie", so I thought I would write a blog post on this subject.  For English-speaking readers of this post, an article summarising the situation can be found at https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/sep/10/gabrielle-deydier-fat-in-france-abuse-grossophobia-book-women .  Note that The Guardian is the British publication that Zoë Williams tends to write for: - she is the journalist who whinges about how perfect we Frenchwomen are.

Gabrielle Deydier claimed she was pushed out of her job as a special education classroom assistant because of her weight.  Me personally, I think it is useless speculating about whether this is true or not.  Maybe she was difficult to deal with in other ways?  We will probably never know.  In my experience as an employer, people often make silly claims like this to divert attention away from poor performance, bad behaviour and other things that make them undesirable employees.

I also note the part about how she spent a year in Spain where her weight wasn't an issue.  Let's be honest here: - France and Spain are not only part of the Single Market (people can live and work in each other's nations under the Maastricht Treaty), but also the Schengen Zone (no hard borders).  You can get on the TGV at various French stations and there is nothing (except perhaps ticket checks) stopping people getting to Spain.  If I were that unhappy with life in France (I am not by any stretch of the imagination), I would ask myself if emigration would improve my life.

Let me be candid here: - I think she looks disgusting and a disgrace to the effortlessly perfect French women you see all around the country.  When I showed Bilal a photo of her and asked his opinion, he didn't hesitate to describe her as "cheum" (verlan for "moche", French for ugly).  I understand the school's difficulty in allowing someone so fat to be around children and set a bad example, but if you are running a fashion magazine (like I am) and someone turns up at an interview looking like that, it makes it clear that they don't have any interest in what we cover as a magazine (looking good, which fashion contributes to).  It reminds me of the interview scene from "The Devil Wears Prada" where Anne Hathaway's character turned up for the interview with Meryl Streep's character unrepentant about her lack of interest in fashion.

That said, I do feel sorry for her, as The Guardian's article makes it clear that the doctor prescribed some remedies that are just not French!  He prescribed medication and a diet of meat and boiled vegetables.  Did the doctor just not know what he was doing?  We Frenchwomen eat all sorts of things that the outside world considers "naughty", such as cheese (I love local cheeses like Banon, Saint-Marcellin, Picodon de la Drôme and Picodon de l'Ardéche), tartiflette, foie gras, Nutella crêpe, steak frites, baguettes, Quiche Lorraine, Croque Monsieur, Raclette/fondue, confit de canard and many other lovely dishes.  As Mireille Guiliano rightly points out, we eat for pleasure (not punishment), but there are some things we do to maintain our wonderful beanpole thin figures: -

• Not eating between meals: - we have proper meals three times a day to eliminate the temptation to snack
• Concentrating on meals properly, so as to avoid mindless eating
• Passive exercise: - walking and taking the stairs as far as reasonably practicable
• Choosing foods that taste delicious, so we get our jollies from the taste, rather than our stomachs being stretched
• Make food look visually appealing for the same reason
• Avoiding uselessly sweet foods, say having desserts slightly sour and only as sweet as they need to be to cleanse the palate of the previous course (e.g. tarte au citron) or perhaps a cheese course before the dessert
• Eating real foods: - breaking the link between sweetness/fat (say with artificial sweeteners and low-fat foods) and calories confuses the body, causing people to eat more
• Never dieting: - we change our habits permanently if something goes wrong
• Drinking bottled water, rather than unhealthy fizzy drinks: - I don't care if Greta Thunberg, the high priestess of the green religion, disapproves of me for this
• Sip champagne and fine wines regularly, but not hard liquor: - hard liquor comes with many additional calories and blunts the taste buds, making it harder to get our jollies from the taste

And, drum roll............................................................

• Saying "la moitié, s'il vous plaît" ("just half of that, please") when offered some food, not forgetting what Mireille Guiliano said about how there are three ways French women stay thin: - portion control, portion control and portion control

In summary, I think Gabrielle Deydier could turn her situation around if she tried (along with some sound advice from an average French woman that she seems to lack).  She has passed her prime career years, but she may be able to recover some semblance of a career if she gets herself back on track.  Rather than whingeing about "grossophobie", she should take responsibility and lose the weight.

Belately realising things

I recently read an article by a Northern Irish lady named Lorraine Wylie belatedly realising how wonderful French women's lives are compared to Northern Irish women at https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/life/features/northern-ireland-can-learn-a-little-on-lifestyle-food-and-fashion-from-the-french-37451558.html .  What struck me most about this is that this was published on the 24th of October 2018 (less than a month ago).  Clearly, though the author has a French first name, she has been stuck in a bunker for the last decade-and-a-half or so!  Has it taken her this long to realise how effortlessly perfect we Frenchwomen are?  No wonder effortlessly perfect Frenchwomen like myself feel the need to go on endlessly about this!  MDR.

The article talks about her visit to her French friend Véronique Maquin Chillou.  She doesn't give the name of the town in which this article is set, though she mentions that it is part of Vienne.  I don't think I would be breaching privacy laws to say a quick Google search reveals it to be Chauvingy in Nouvelle Aquitaine.  This part of France is particularly famous for goat's cheese, with less famous foods being Echiré butter, Farci Poitevin paté and Tourteau Fromagé.  Not as wonderful as Provence, but every culinary region of France is wonderful compared to any region (or country) not under French sovereignty.

Lorraine Wylie talks about how she walked up the steep cobbled streets.  I must say, if she views French women's passive exercise as a new revelation, I can't think what sort of isolated circumstances she has been living in.  This woman has probably been sweating away in a gym (and overeating afterwards) in an attempt to lose weight, as is typical among frumpy Anglo-Saxon women.  Meanwhile, we Frenchwomen are staying effortlessly thin, to oversimplify things slightly, by just walking more (using the stairs and less car travel) and saying "la moitié, s'il vous plaît" when offered some food.

Regarding the tips about beauty, yes, a Frenchwoman definitely knows how to use a beauty regimen to make herself look nice, though I think Véronique Maquin Chillou has a fairly laborious routine.  I don't spend anywhere near the time she appears to spend on beauty (I have compressed my routine to a few minutes in the morning) yet Bilal still thinks I am a "bufft'ing" and comes home each evening with a huge appetite for after our sons have been put to bed.

The advice on food is hardly revolutionary.  Véronique Maquin Chillou says she makes rich dishes and avoids processed foods, sticking to simple things (a Frenchwoman loves elegant simplicity).  She also doesn't avoid cheese, desserts and wine, three not-so-guilty pleasures that Frenchwomen regularly enjoy.  The biggest No-sh"BLEEP"-Sherlock part of the article is "As suspected, a slender silhouette has nothing to do with national heritage. It doesn't matter which side of the channel our bread is buttered, staying in shape is simply about portion control."  I don't know how many times the phrase "La moitié, s'il vous plaît" has appeared in this blog so far.  Okay, she might have been suspecting it for a long time, though I don't know why it took so long for her to confirm her suspicions.

Okay, it is generally harder to reach Northern Ireland from France than the nations making up Great Britain (England, Scotland and Wales) by land, but how has Lorraine Wylie been in the dark for so long?  She talks about the tips as if they were groundbreaking new revelations, which they should not be, even in the Anglo-Saxon world.  This demonstrates that there is plenty more work to do with this blog!

Taking credit where it isn't due

As many of my readers will be aware, I am strongly in favour of trains as a transportation mode.  Mireille Guiliano has often pointed out passive exercise as being a reason why French women are so effortlessly thin and perfect.  In order to make this situation workable in today's globalised world, it is necessary to have good public transportation networks, of which high-speed intercity railway plays an important part.

Of the presidents we French have had in the past few years, Nicolas Sarkozy is the one I am most favourably disposed towards.  He didn't help himself by being a bling-bling president pursuing a glamorous romance with his now-wife Carla Bruni, but he did many good things, such as coming up with some ideas for economic reform (rewarding hard work) and setting the process in motion for construction of LGVs (Lignes à Grande Vitesse, or high-speed lines), in particular Le Mans-Rennes, Tours-Bordeaux and Nîmes-Montpellier.  In addition to this, he played a key role in starting the process for introducing high-speed rail to Morocco.

Granted, an organisation cannot go on indefinitely if its debts just keep ballooning and I am pleased that Emmanuel Macron is cracking down on the gravy train that many SNCF employees enjoy, but I am not happy with the change in the way high-speed lines will be funded.  https://www.railjournal.com/in_depth/sncf-reform-back-on-track-after-devastating-strike explains that SNCF Network will not fund any more high-speed line projects, but the funding will come from the regions.  I don't mind the idea that people in Marseille shouldn't be funding the Tours-Bordeaux line, given the limited benefits we will receive from it.  Some of the principles behind it are good, but what I am unhappy with is the possibility that it will make LGV construction unviable, given the relative lack of power regions have to pull together disparate funding sources.  It is hypothetically possible that Languedoc-Roussillon will persuade say Catalonia and the Spanish government to chip in for the LGV Montpellier-Perpignan.  Maybe PACA (Provence-Alpes-Côte d'Azur) will persuade Liguria, Italy and other French regions to chip in for the upgrades to the Marseille-Nice route.  I am not holding my breath though.  Marseille-Nice is already badly congested and Montpellier-Perpignan stands to get worse, given the lines that converge at the ends of the proposed route (two in Montpellier and three in Perpignan).

Having done so much to stop future high-speed line construction, our ridiculous president is making appearances when new lines kicked off by Nicolas Sarkozy are opened.  He showed up at the ceremony concerning the soon-to-be-opened Tangiers-Kénitra line, even though it clearly wouldn't have happened under him: - https://newsbeezer.com/franceeng/morocco-inaugurates-the-first-tgv-line-in-africa/ .  I am pleased that the government pushed through the Paris-Marseille route with a lot of enthusiasm, but it is a shame LGV development looks like it has come to a grinding halt in France.

Update: - third baby born

Apologies to my readers for the lack of updates.  Our third son was born a couple of months ago and I have been distracted from this blog by the various things to do at home and work.  Mireille Guiliano has explained how French women are good at making choices.  In her case, she chose not to have children in favour of having a career.  Later, she chose retirement and writing over her role as CEO of Veuve-Cliquot.  In my case, I wanted to continue expanding the reach of my magazine and my family, meaning that my blogging about how wonderful French women are has taken a back seat.  This is not to say that I will never write any more blog posts though: - I am hoping to write some more when I have some more spare time and creative energies.

I don't tend to write much about family matters.  Bilal was never a controlling man, but he is a very private man, so out of kindness to him, I run topics that concern him or our children by him before I write them.  He is happy for me to talk about our fast-growing family, as he is very proud to have had a third son so quickly: - he is very much a man who is still in his prime.  Let's just say he is not slowing down!  He is also happy for me to talk about him being hip-hop.  However, he jealousy guards our sons' privacy and wants this to continue until they are old enough to decide for themselves how much of their lives they want to expose in public.  Therefore, all I will say about our third son is that mother and baby are both doing well, plus the father and the older two sons.

I have various things to say regarding news articles.  For instance, the LGV Nîmes-Montpellier will open to passenger traffic on the 8th of July (it opened to freight traffic in December 2017), with Montpellier's Sud de France station also entering service that day.  However, Bilal is disappointed with the fact that in the interim, it will not speed up his train journeys to visit his homies in Seville: - he loves to take our sons on the train to Seville to visit his homies (I come along when I am able).  Only a few passenger trains (not tending to cover this route) will use the station each day in the interim.  This is because it is not possible to use the new line to serve Nîmes until Nîmes-Pont de Gard station is complete.  Also, the current lack of an extension of Line 1 of Montpellier's trams to Sud de France station limits the station's usefulness.

Also, there are the French railway reforms that were recently passed.  Reforms of SNCF are badly overdue: - its workers are all too often unionised and entitled, causing the organisation to be bloated.  I am hopeful that the reforms will lead to lower taxpayer subsidies and lower ticket prices.  However, the main problem with Emmanuel Macron's ways of doing things regarding railways is his lack of enthusiasm for building new LGV routes.  François Hollande pushed back the LGV Montpellier-Perpignan and his successor looks set to push it back even further: - this route will also reduce the train time to Seville for Bilal.

There was the famous incident of Mamadou Gassama, the Malian immigrant who climbed up a few flights on the outside of an apartment block to save a baby boy in danger of falling.  There is no doubt that this man's actions saved this boy from extreme danger, though from rumours I have heard, it pales in comparison to some of the things Bilal did while growing up in La Savine.  I mentioned in a previous post that he saved a child in danger of drowning: - if the rumours are correct, this was among the tamer examples of things he has done.  Still, Bilal and Mamadou Gassama put many native-born Frenchmen to shame in terms of what they will do to protect the vulnerable.

Loads of things to catch up on, but hopefully, I will write some more posts when I have time!

Fantastic news!

Apologies to my readers for taking so long to deliver the news.  I'll come straight to the point: - I am pregnant for the third time!  The baby is due to be born in the spring.  We have already had scans done that have revealed that we are expecting a third son!  I was delighted and so was Bilal: - he didn't waste time calling up his homies to brag about how he was a big enough man to accomplish this three times in quick succession!

I am doing most of my work from home at the moment: - I attend fashion shows, but I don't go to the office very often unless I need to.  Bilal persuaded me that as a self-employed successful businesswoman, I should exercise my right to do this, particularly with current technologies (I work using a hybrid tablet/laptop that uses mobile broadband).  With my third pregnancy and our oldest son walking and demanding lots of attention, he has been a bit worried about me lately, so I agreed I would spend more time at home to convince him I was relaxing, even though I have filled up much of the surplus time researching new fashions and hunting for the choicest ingredients in the markets!  MDR!

My vision for our sons

In a recent post, I briefly alluded to how I would like our sons to turn out as adults and thought I would do a full article about it.  It is natural for parents to have views on how their children will turn out, even if plans can very easily be scuppered.  Firstly, any parent who wants the best for their children will want them to grow up in the Lord and become born again.  We will provide our sons with the best theological education we can and pray that he will come to saving repentance, but under the principle of Unconditional Election, God has decided who He will bring to saving repentance and man cannot change His decision, so we can only do our best and pray.

The view of Bilal and myself is that there is no merit in treating boys and girls as if they were the same.  Feminists want to get rid of gender differences, rather than celebrate them, which in my view makes them the misogynists.  A girl such as myself is keen to make the most of her femininity, even if Zoë Williams dislikes the use of the word, though I think it is very good at communicating femininity.  If I have a daughter, I will pass on to her all the beauty secrets that have been passed down through the family and make sure her first phrase is "la moitié, s'il vous plaît" and, although it is good for women to be ready for physical labour, we will still treat her as weaker vessels.  On the other hand, regarding our sons, Bilal plans to trip them up and push them over (on soft, grassy ground, never on concrete), playfully punch them, throw them high in the air (obviously catching them afterwards), play "knuckles", "slapsies" and "mercy", tickle them and other ruff and tumble activities that ensure they accumulate lots of bruises.  His expectation is that if they fall and hurt themselves, they will get up again for more.

I want our sons to be both rugged.  Our sons will not be pampered wimps too accustomed to air-conditioned environments.  In keeping with Touareg custom, they will begin training as a herdsman when he is three years old, as well as being trained at Bilal's farm near Marseille.  Bilal's relatives have already agreed to have them during our spring when the weather is very hot, though Bilal has threatened very serious consequences if they so much as mention Islam to them.  Bilal is also learning mountaineering, so that he can get them used to mountain environments in mid-winter: - Bilal wants to climb Mont Blanc (4808m above sea level) when he is able and take our sons with him.  He also has homies from the Côte d'Ivoire and Congo in La Savine, through whom he is beginning discussions about jungle survival training: - Bilal is not used to jungle environments and wants to learn, so as to teach our sons.  As our sons grow up, they will also ensure he spends plenty of evenings and weekends with his grandparents in La Savine, so as to get him used to gangland environments and toughen them up.  This means operating in them, rather than mimicking their culture, MDR!  Part of this will involve fighting skills and learning to box, which Bilal already knows a lot about.  Ultimately, we want them to be unwilling to shy away from physical hurt in pursuit of noble aims, be this fighting for their country or stepping up to protect a lady falling victim to dangerous drunkards, rather than running away because they are afraid of damaging their nails, MDR.

However, as well as rugged, I want them to be gentlemanly.  I don't like much about Britain, but the traditional British gentleman culture is something I want them to learn.  This will involve learning  how to conduct themselves in different social situations, how to dress neatly, how to be properly groomed and everything else.  People often misunderstand what being gentlemanly means: - some view it as flirting with women one has no intention of pursuing and making them swoon.  We will want our sons to understand that being gentlemanly is the complete opposite: - it means avoiding excessive familiarity with women unless they are seriously pursuing them as a potential wife and not leading them on.  Providence enabled Bilal to find a wife who loves him for who he is and isn't offended in the slightest when he refers to attractive women as "well buff wifeys" or "bufft'ings", but I want our sons to know how to refer to women properly, just in case ladies they desire are sensitive about that sort of thing.

We will make sure they are extremely diligent in their academic studies.  We want them to be brains as well as brawn.  We want them to graduate from university in useful vocational subjects, rather than a Mickey Mouse arts degree.  Maybe they will be enthusiastic enough to do PhDs?  Who knows.  Oxbridge and Ivy League institutions are very prestigious, but Bilal and I would worry about our children being deep in cesspits of liberalism such as these.  They aren't exactly known for their tolerance of different points of view.  Bilal liked the fact that studying engineering at university meant he was relatively free of the social scientists!

We haven't got fixed ideas about what career our sons ought to go into, though we have got some ideas about what careers might use the various skills we intend to teach him.  A commission in the Foreign Legion might be one way.  I would love to see them in blues uniform and the ladies swooning over them!  I also wouldn't mind them becoming rolling stock engineers like their father and grandfather: - the TGV network is one thing that makes France great.

HS2 and comparing with France

Apologies to my readers for leaving such a very long time between posts.  There have been various things happening at home and work that I will discuss.  I started many stubs for posts, but didn't have the time to bring them to completion, so I am clearing out the backlog, updating them for current events as need be.

For several years in Britain now, a high-speed line between London and Birmingham (initially) and beyond has been under discussion.  I was reading an article about the effects of high-speed rail in France, discussing a study that claims high-speed rail only benefits the managerial classes.  As a successful businesswoman, I am very aware that there are lies, damned lies and statistics.  There are several factors about France's high-speed rail system that they have ignored.

The TGV system is designed to benefit French society as a whole, not just the wealthy.  Spain has pursued the opposite direction until the past week, when it announced its EVA brand, which is intended to serve outlying areas of Barcelona, similar to France's Ouigo service.  The service will go from Madrid-Puerta de Atocha to Camp de Tarragona and El Prat de Llobregat stations (the latter not yet being open for high-speed traffic).  Austria's RailJet service, though it has economy offerings, pursues the business market aggressively, as indicated by the huge reclining Premium seats.  These take up enormous amounts of space: - RailJet trains in normal composition are around 205m long with 408 seats, but Westbahn (the Austrian open-access operator) is purchasing Stadler 6-car (around 25m per car, therefore 150m long) KISS trains with 526 seats.

On the other hand, France concentrates on the fundamentals: - high capacity, good-value offerings and great journey times.  A Frenchwoman doesn't like garish interior decoration, so the relatively simple furnishings even in first class have been highly appreciated.  The TGV Euroduplex sets have 560 seats and the TGV Océane sets have 556 seats.  Also, there are the Ouigo services operated directly by SNCF and the Izy services operated by Thalys which SNCF part-owns.  Ouigo keeps costs down by serving underused stations, whereas the Izy services do this by travelling on slower and cheaper conventional routes: - both have Ryanair-style baggage policies.  Given how impossibly dainty we are, we Frenchwomen have little need for the super-sized Premium seats that OEBB/ÖBB (the Austrian state operator) uses on RailJet services, but they are still cool!

That is not to say that the TGV system doesn't appeal to successful businesswomen such as myself: - we appreciate being able to get lots of work done on the train using our tablet-laptop hybrids whilst we zip between important meetings (as well as fashion shows, in my case).  As France typically has a 35-hour week, the quid pro quo is that high productivity rates are necessary if we want a high standard of living.  We Frenchwomen accomplish this effortlessly.  When I lived and worked in London, was still frowned upon for leaving on time, even though my colleagues wasted lots of time in useless tasks and got half as much work done as me!

HS2 has been criticised as being just a luxury line, but this fails to take account of what the line is intended to do.  It is intended to be a relief line for the congested West Coast Main Line: - the commuter trains are already very packed and the freight capacity is squeezed.  There are passenger trains (e.g. the cramped Pendolino services operated by Virgin) which go a long way north before stopping anywhere: - some London Euston services don't stop until Warrington Bank Quay (near Liverpool).  Such services have no need whatsoever to be on the conventional West Coast Main Line south of Crewe (opening 2027, a year later than the first stage to Birmingham), so HS2 would be useful for such services.

According to an article Railway Gazette recently published about the findings of the "Conseil d’Orientation des Infrastructures" and its recommendations for future direction in railway construction, some lines should be prioritised: - http://www.railwaygazette.com/news/single-view/view/capacity-enhancement-at-hubs-is-spending-priority-says-infrastructure-council.html .  I am delighted that they recommended prioritising the Marseille-Nice line: - I love going to places like Nice, St. Tropez and Monaco because of how ritzy-glitzy they are!  On the other hand, it is a shame they aren't specifically recommending taking forward the LGV Montpellier-Perpignan: - I often have have business in Spain and Bilal loves to visit his homies in Seville and we would love to be able to do this all the way.

Anyway, we shall see what happens with these schemes in the UK and France!

Excuses

Having just given birth to our second baby and received regular confirmation from Bilal that I am still a "well buff wifey", I am once again reminded of how thin and impossibly perfect my figure is.  Bilal is welcoming lots of visitors from La Savine (hip-hop people, in other words) to see our son: - the police were called to my flat because someone called them suggesting that there was drug dealing going on here, MDR.  When Bilal's homies visit, he lets his guard down, i.e. using hip-hop French I don't always understand and openly talking about knocking me up and me being "well buff" after two children: - his "homies" often express open agreement with the second point.  Unlike many Western women, I love this aspect of Bilal and I would never want a herbivore man: - I was always attracted to big, strong and macho men.  I ask him to try and avoid saying things too openly in front of people who aren't from La Savine (who are like him) or church (who have come to accept him as he is), as it is easier to just not have to explain, MDR.

Being a mother-of-two and still beanpole thin, one thing that has become ever more apparent to me is that Anglo-Saxon women have an endless supply of excuses for not being thin.  On the other hand, a Frenchwoman has an iron will and unbreakable self-discipline that enables her to be attractive in any season of life (both the young filly and old bag season, as Zoë Williams put it, MDR).  In this blog post, I outline typical excuses of Anglo-Saxon women and what a Frenchwoman's solutions are.

Excuses

Anglo-Saxon women seem to be under this bizarre impression that they need to eat for two when expecting a baby.  Granted, I have only given birth to two children, but having used the same strategy to stay thin during both pregnancies, my assumption is that the process is repeatable, no matter how many children a woman has: - Bilal is only too happy to oblige in enabling me to prove this, MDR.  During both pregnancies, I observed the rules I observed when not pregnant, primarily portion size.  If you remember them and have an iron will like we Frenchwomen, there is no reason to ever get fat.

Many Western women fall into the trap of comfort eating, the excuse being that because they are sad, depressed or whatever, they comfort-eat.  In other words, what they are saying is they have a bad lack of self-control when their moods are low.  A Frenchwoman knows very well that comfort eating never was the solution to low moods, as it causes large amounts of food to become like an addition, i.e. she is bad-tempered until she gets her fix.

Another common thing Western women do is blame people around them for "unrealistic" images of beauty, i.e. setting off a yo-yo dieting pattern because she does crash dieting to achieve the desired weight, which is followed up by eating more and getting heavier.  They often blame unrealistic images and the men in their lives, as Natalie Grant did in that article.  Our Heavenly Father displayed His wisdom in pairing Bilal and me: - I am able to listen to all he has to say about me being a "well buff wifey", appreciate it, and still remain in full control of my eating and weight, irrespective of anything Bilal does or doesn't say.  Natalie Grant (the author of the article the link points to) would no doubt respond in a similar way if she were married to a man like Bilal who appreciates fine women.

Solutions

Simple solutions are often the best.  A Frenchwoman knows that there is no black magic necessary to achieve a pencil thin figure: - just say "la moitié, s'il vous plaît" at every mealtime!  If necessary, keep doing so until the portion is befitting of a dainty Frenchwoman!  Simple!  This phrase has been key to keeping a Frenchwoman thin for many generations.  A French female learns this phrase that acts as the perfect solution for staying thin when she first starts to talk.

If the food portions available are more than twice as big as they should be, the next solution is to remember what proper food portion sizes are.  Mireille Guiliano discussed portion sizes she regards as standard, though truth be told, they are a little too big for me, MDR.  Even so, the principle  behind the solution is the same: - women should build an idea in their mind about what standard portion sizes are and stick to what they remember.  If she lacks ambition and she wants to use Mireille's portion sizes, she can carry such objects around with her to look at during quiet moments and continue building up her familiarity.

Exercising control of moods is another solution.  A Frenchwoman does not tend to indulge her moods in ways that lead to her indulging herself further with food.  Anglo-Saxon women tend to get angry about things and rant angrily, before resorting to comfort eating to lift their moods.  On the other hand, a Frenchwoman will just light another Gauloise (just kidding, we French women are not the stereotypical chainsmokers Zoë Williams thinks we are), do a Gallic shrug and say "bof".  She knows that self-discipline in general is key: - if she has mastered it over her moods, she will more than likely have self-discipline over food as well.  I am not saying a Frenchwoman never has trying times in life, but her solution is to deal with them by other means, such as more searching for beautiful garments.

The power of imagination is another solution in a Frenchwoman's arsenal.  She considers eating more of her favourite foods and then remembers the joy of being able to fit into all her favourite clothes.  When tempted, she thinks of the joy of being able to walk round in tight outfits and the misery of being too fat to fit into beautiful clothes!  Simple!  The only times I have ever been too big are during my two pregnancies: - the danger during this time is women will slip, given that she won't fit into her previous clothes anyway, so she needs to picture a postpartum shopping spree for the most gorgeous clothes she can find (I wouldn't dream of wearing fashions from 9 months ago) and fitting into all of them perfectly as she has no pregnancy pounds.  One day, I hopped on the train at Marseille-St. Charles at 08.38, arrived in Paris 3h07m later, rushed round shops selling haute couture (that would never fit fat and dumpy Anglo-Saxon women) and found anything I wanted fitted me just like before. I got on the 16.15 train at Paris-Gare de Lyon with my hands full of shopping (plenty of room though, given how little of the seat I took up, MDR) and 3h10m later arrived back at Marseille-St. Charles to find Bilal waiting for me with our sons telling me I was a "well buff wifey" in my latest outfit and that he was treating us to an exquisite dinner at the Vieux Port.  Imaging such situations is the ideal solution for maintaining self-control during pregnancy!

Though France suffers from big government, a Frenchwoman knows the solution is to take responsibility for her own body.  Mireille Guiliano pointed out that "French women choose their own indulgences and compensations.  They understand that little things count, both additions and subtractions, and that as an adult everyone is the keeper of her own equilibrium."  It is nice that Natalie Grant chose to take control of her diet for her own health, but she is vulnerable to falling into the bulimia trap again, as she lays the blame for this at the hands of her ex-boyfriend/fiancé, rather than accepting she is the keeper of her own equilibrium.  Granted, her ex-boyfriend/fiancé was unsuitable for her as a believing lady: - my daddy made it clear he would turn away all suitors if they had no history of regular attendance, participation and volunteering in a church (eventually, he realised it was not possible to fault Bilal on this).  However, a Frenchwoman has self-control and self-discipline and accepts responsibility whatever the men in her life are like: - I would never take the easy way out and blame the men in my life (Bilal and our two sons) for sidetracking me from exercising personal responsibility for staying beanpole thin!

So there you go: - common excuses for not being thin and a Frenchwoman's way round these excuses.  Stop making excuses and be impossibly perfect as we Frenchwomen are!

Our second child

I have given birth to our second son.  As expected, Bilal was overjoyed by the arrival.  One could falsely believe that he wasn't, given how much he has spoken about subsequent children, but he has been visibly excited throughout the pregnancy and his joy in holding our second son just after he was born was clear for everyone to see.  In one sense, nobody deserves anything, given that we all fall short of God's glory, but in another sense, given the fruits Bilal has produced during his Christian journey, I think Bilal really deserved this type of fruit.  He has a yearning for a big family and I am very aware that it is something he has aspired to for pretty much all his life.

As with his older brother, our son was a very pretty baby immediately upon being born and he was born with some lovely curly locks and beautiful light brown skin in between the skin shades Bilal and I have.  I would have enrolled them as baby models immediately if Bilal hadn't said no: - personal privacy is one of his primary preoccupations, so this is out the question, but I don't mind, as he clearly has his family's best interests at heart.  He is no controlling husband and does not do things like demand to know where I am at any moment of day, lol.  Marriage is about give and take and Bilal has certainly given a lot, so even by the standards of non-believers, there is no justification for upsetting him by sharing photos of our sons against his will (the boy in the photo below is not ours).

The delivery had no complications and I was immediately back to my previous waist measurement and weight with no fat to lose.  People often say this doesn't tend to happen, but I have managed it during both my pregnancies!  It is easy if you just eat sensibly: - just utter the magic phrase at mealtimes ("la moitie, s'il vous plait)!  MDR!  The lack of complications meant that I left hospital within a matter of hours: - as a BBC article pointed out, we French are often hypochondriacs, but it was blatantly obvious there was nothing wrong with me.  This was nice, because although I don't do much worrying about my health (since I eat properly), Bilal does.  He can be very attentive if he suspects I am unwell and it is often hard work to reassure him.  Even with French standards of hypochondria, he has made a name for himself at the local doctor's surgery for being overly cautious with almost every sniffle our first son has had, MDR.

Within an hour of completion of the delivery, Bilal was talking about future children, which attracted an unwanted disapproving comment from a feminist member of the hospital staff: - "Come on!  Your wife has just given birth and you want to force more children on her like she is some breeding animal?  A woman is worth more than the children she bears!"  Bilal was visibly shaken by this comment and he is uneasy about engaging in conversation with unrelated women, so I stepped in: - "Madam, I am aware of many options open to me in this country if I were in an abusive marriage and my husband were forcing me to have children against my will, but he is not, so I will thank you not to interfere in our private family life".  Bilal said very little after that and was clearly very upset, but he returned to his normal ungentlemanly self after we left the hospital with our sons and returned home, MDR.

Save for my parents who were at the hospital and came home with us, our first acquaintances to visit were some of his "homies" from La Savine who he has been trying to encourage to come along to our church.  When they rang the bell from the street entrance, Bilal was naturally too engrossed in our sons to notice, so Daddy went to the intercom.  The poor quality of their French made Daddy reluctant to let them in, so he asked Bilal if he knew them, to which Bilal abruptly replied "let them in, they are manz homies from La Savine".  When Daddy let them in at the door, he was visibly unimpressed with their attire (low-slung trousers and hooded tops covering most of their faces).  Upon seeing our second son, they said, "Congratulations fam!  You da man!"  Bilal replied, "True dat!  Manz only been married 19 months and manz knocked up manz well buff wifey twice and manz now got two sons!  Manz gonna knock her up again as soon as possible and be an even bigger man!  Us manz Heavenly Father has given man a bare sick gift between manz legs!"  Bilal then did a hip-thrust gesture and a loud grunt whilst saying that for effect.  This caused me to start sniggering and my parents let out a groan: - Daddy never liked Bilal's ungentlemanly behaviour and he tried to turn Bilal into a gentleman when we were courting and subsequently engaged, but eventually just gave up, reasoning that Bilal is an otherwise wholesome man, even if he is quite hip-hop with some similarly hip-hop friends.  I am expecting Bilal to be similarly ungentlemanly when we go to church today, MDR.

Bilal is enjoying his short time on paternity leave.  Ever since becoming a father, he has been almost clingy with our sons: - though he enjoys his job and works very hard, I know that he is always yearning for the end of the working day to come so he can come home and be with me and our offspring.  His interaction with our sons is at least as much as mine.

Vive la présidente!

On Sunday, we French will be going to the first round of the polls of the presidential election.  As many of my readers will be aware, the candidate Bilal and I view most favourably (remembering that none of them are a perfect match to us) is Marine Le Pen.

Bilal thinks her niece Marion Maréchal-Le Pen (Marine's niece) is a "well buff wifey", though he views her as being less attractive than me and therefore doesn't look at her with lust, MDR.  He and I agree it is nice that we French have relatively nice-looking female politicians than the frumpy and dowdy ones on the other side of the English Channel.  Theresa May isn't the worst, but she was at best plain in her youth, as she is today.  Bilal notes that Marine Le Pen was reasonably "buff" in her youth, even if she is overweight (by French standards, but not by British standards, MDR).  Though there are many things Bilal and I like about the United Kingdom (its rich Reformation history), the physical appearances of its female politicians (and women in general) leave a lot to be desired.  However, with Marine Le Pen being the only major female presidential candidate, there is not much to be said regarding comparisons of candidates' physical appearances.

Moving on to the less important issue of what their policies are, Bilal and I view Marine Le Pen's policies most favourably.  In the past 24 hours, there has been yet another terrorist attack in France, which seems to have had Islamic motivations.  Let us be clear, being a believer is never easy in any part of France: - very few sectors of French society are in favour of biblical teaching, given how much our nation regrettably did to persecute the Huguenots over the centuries.  However, La Savine has large numbers of Muslim migrants who tend to be very actively hostile to the faith: - Bilal struggled to deal with this and enjoys the less close-knit lifestyle that my penthouse apartment offers him, though he tries to keep up his work in the community of La Savine as much as possible.  Both of us would welcome the reduction in Islamic migration that Marine Le Pen promises, given the hostility our faith already suffers.

Marine Le Pen's economic policies are actually quite leftie.  She seems to be appealing to the stick-in-the-mud Luddite French workers who want to continue doing their jobs the way they have always done them and continue to enjoy ever-rising wages.  As Margaret Thatcher said, "No!  No!  No!": - constantly rising wages require constant innovation.  This means a constant search for efficiency and better products: - as a fashion magazine editor, I very much understand the importance of keeping ahead of the game.

I don't think Anglo-Saxon economic policies are necessarily good, as they centre around the principle of knowing the cost of everything and the value of nothing, as highlighted by a recent Financial Times article regarding Alstom's Belfort plant.  Continental European economies seem to work on providing long-term value, whereas Anglo-Saxon economics seems to be "slash-and-burn".  Given that France doesn't have the same silliness with shareholders demanding short-term cash flow, it is possible to focus on solutions providing long-term value.  The Financial Times article doesn't mention the fact that the order will enable SNCF to retire some fleets early and drastically reduce the number of different fleets in service.  In his work for "Le Trom de Marseille", Bilal only has to deal with one fleet (the MPM 76), but his railway industry acquaintances elsewhere tell him how annoying it is when you have to do an enormous amount of work to account for local fleet variations.  However, given their extreme ignorance about how a train operating company and rolling stock engineers work, it is easy for morons working at the Financial Times to criticise the TGV order.  I am generally supportive of Marine Le Pen's desire to avoid slash-and-burn economics.

France is actually doing very well with per-hour-productivity and I don't think increasing the working week would necessarily result in higher output (as Emmanuel Macron proposes), but its working practices are very staid.  Bilal often quotes the famous Neville Shute saying that says "an engineer is a man who can do for five shillings what any damned fool could do for a pound": - if we want to be richer, we need to be constantly on the lookout for improvements and unfortunately, Marine Le Pen's economic policies do very little to encourage this.  They seem to encourage the I-farm-cattle-because-my-father-did-and-his-father-before-him-did-and-his-father-before-him-did mentality.  In summary, I would prefer a candidate combining the best economic policies of both sides, but our presidential candidates are what they are.

All that said, I hope that next month, we will be chanting "Vive la présidente!"

Stuttgart: - a city of viticulture

Though I am heavily pregnant and due to give birth any day now, it was necessary to travel to Germany on business, as I am trying to get my magazine set up with a German office along with all the necessary infrastructure, such as distributors (admittedly, this is less of an issue in the online age).  I am considering the question of which cities to site the premises in.

To me, transport connectivity is a big issue, as in spite of the internet revolution, the fashion business contains many aspects that just require people to be there in person.  Airport connections don't really cut it for a Frenchwoman, as the short working week means she needs to be productive all the time, meaning that if she travels as part of her job, she needs to be able to do work during the journey, i.e. on a laptop/tablet hybrid on a table.  It was therefore necessary to choose a city that is well-linked to France and other German cities.

One of the cities I am considering is Stuttgart.  Current direct journey times from Paris are 3h11m.  This should drop further when the Rastatt Tunnel is opened in 2022.  Frankfurt is 1h17m on the fastest services.  Munich is 2h13m, though this will drop substantially with the Stuttgart 21 project's completion and the new line to Ulm.

Berlin is 5h04m, though it admittedly has a long way to go before it becomes a fashion capital, even though it is full of the metro-trendies from my industry I detest!  The Stuttgart 21 project will convert the main station from a terminus into a through station and shift it underground and will be completed concurrently with the Stuttgart-Wendlingen-Ulm high-speed line.  When they all open in 2021, they are expected to reduce journeys starting in Stuttgart by around 26 minutes, with Frankfurt-Munich journeys (via the Stuttgart route) being about 3h00m instead of 3h37m.  The increased saving for through journeys exists because of the time penalty for turning a train around.

In addition to good intercity connections, Stuttgart also has a great metropolitan public transport network, focused mainly on the tram system, but it also has a rack railway and funicular railway as part of its urban transport system, as the city is built on a series of hills.  Being from Marseille, this is something I am used to: - the city is shielded by mountains that mean the city is 8.4 degrees Celcius in January, compared with 5.5 in nearby Aix-en-Provence.  Bilal is more used to it, given the years spent in La Savine, a high-up area of the city.  The city has a series of outdoor staircases, a bit like Los Ángeles.

The Romans quickly discovered that Stuttgart has a mild climate suited to viticulture (some vineyards are a few hundred metres from the main station), which gives it an air of sophistication, though not to the same extent as France.  Germany has a reasonably large number of wine-producing areas: - the Rhine and Mosel(le) valleys are often used for wine cultivation.  The custom in these areas is to pick the grapes when snow arrives, which gives an extremely sweet quasi-dessert wine flavour: - not very good to my way of thinking, being a sophisticated Frenchwoman, but ultra-sweet dessert wines work with a few foods, such as crème caramel and blue cheese (Roquefort being a well-known French example).

Stuttgart is the capital of the Baden-Württemberg state and therefore contains the state parliament.  It is also the biggest city in the state and therefore the place where things are happening.  It is also a huge centre for the automotive industry: - Porsche and Mercedes-Benz are based in the city.  As my readers will know, I am less enthusiastic about cars, given the increased difficulty of finding somewhere to drive at 320km/h (the LGV Est, Rhine-Rhône, Sud-Europe Atlantique and Bretagne), but these two brands have definitely succeeded in creating an image of glamour!  Certainly, Stuttgart is a very prosperous city and these brands reinforce the image of luxury living.

A French it-girl such as myself will always be on the lookout for good places to go shopping.  I haven't slowed down on shopping since becoming a mother, as motherhood is not the time to kick back, neglect personal beauty and end up looking ugly: - this is what silly Anglo-Saxon women do!  Stuttgart is not as fabulous as the best French shopping destinations, but there are some reasonable bargain basement offerings and entry-level international cuisine in the form of the Calwer Passage: - after all, if German women are aspiring to be impossibly perfect and dainty like we Frenchwomen, they have to start somewhere!  MDR.

We shall see if this venture into Germany is successful and whether a whole new country can be made aware of how impossibly and unattainably perfect we French women are (and ideally inspired to replicate our impossible example even though they will never reach it)!