Real beauty

Following on from my article when I commented on Marine Le Pen's physical beauty (or lack thereof), I thought it would be good to do an article on what I consider to be real beauty, in my position as an expert fashion connoisseur and fashion editor and a real heterosexual Frenchwoman.  My magazine makes a point of targeting real beauty.  The fashion industry is regrettably controlled by men who are receievers of swollen goods, which means that a lot of fashion models do not reflect what real heterosexual men and women find beautiful.

I am not talking about plus-sized models.  I find that look utterly atrocious.  I would not allow my magazine to feature Tess Holliday (whose tattoos make her look even less attractive), unless I did a special fat-shaming issue!  MDR.  My magazine targets what real men and real women find attractive: - slim hourglass figures for women and muscular physiques for men, which is at odds with the flat-chested women and bony and androgynous-looking men who appear on many catwalks due to the influence of homosexual men in the fashion industry.

Tattoos are not attractive on either gender.  This is due to my view as a Frenchwoman that natural beauty is good and my view as a Christian woman that one's body is a temple of the Holy Spirit (1Corinthians 3:16 and 6:19): - one would not face a holy temple and so neither should one deface one's body (granted, the temple in the picture below is an idol temple).

In spite of all my use of the magic phrase "la moitié, s'il vous plaît", I know very well that it is not attractive for a lady to be flat-chested: - hourglass figures are attractive because men are wired up to desire women for childbearing and who have self-discipline.  A narrow waist indicates self-discipline, big hips indicate the ability to carry his offspring and large mammary glands are desired given that that is how she will (in a large proportion of cases) feed his offspring for the first few months of their lives.  I advocate saying "la moitié, s'il vous plaît" at every mealtime, but the bony look is not attractive either: - Mireille Guiliano points out that a Frenchwoman eats three meals a day.

Facelifts also look horrible: - Mireille Guiliano points out in "French women don't get face lifts" exactly what the title says.  Natural beauty works better, in spite of Zoë Williams' gormless rant about the book.  I sincerely hope Donald Trump (rather than Hillary Clinton) wins this week, but Melania/Melanija Trump is a classic example of an older woman who looks a bit like a hallowe'en character on account of apparent facelifts.

The classic example of a lady with this sort of physical beauty is Marilyn Monroe.  Some of my readers might pipe up and say that I have traditionally been very critical of American women and their inability to stay thin.  I say "American women didn't get fat in the 50s" (this blog is now known by the name "Outdated by design").  I don't just do women of the past though.  Even though Marine Le Pen doesn't have much physical beauty, her niece (Marion Maréchal-Le Pen) does: - I love the fact that in spite of her physical beauty and political success, she has spoken to promote the beauty of motherhood and generally promotes conservative values (she was a prominent marcher in anti-same-sex marriage rallies).  She represents Vaucluse's 3rd constituency, which is centred around Carpentras, which is very easy to reach from Marseille using a connecting TER service via Avignon TGV station and the recently-reopened Carpentras branch.  I would love to do a whole magazine devoted to her, given her position as a conservative woman who is a pretty face and much, much more, but the danger is that this would attract protests from old-school feminists who grumble about the lack of attention given to the jobs a woman does in favour of her appearance, MDR.

The fashion industry also does not understand what real beauty is in men either.  When I attend fashion shows, I constantly have expressions of disapproval when I see bony androgynous male models walking past me on the catwalk.  Real women such as myself do not find that at all attractive.  Real women want men to be real men: - it is our ungodly world that seeks to blur gender boundaries.

I simply don't see the point of six-packs either, as they are simply not reflective of a man's abdominal strength.  I am not all that enthused by well-defined muscles either.  I have heard stories of men participating in bodybuilding contests having 2% body fat and it being painful to walk, given the absence of fat on the feet: - I struggle to see what the point of this is.  If a man wants high physical strength, he needs to eat accordingly: - strongmen should not say, "la moitié, s'il vous plaît".  I much prefer the sort of body that men participating in strongman contests have: - big muscles, but not necessarily well-defined.  To get that look, men often have to do odd things like not drinking for two days prior to a photo shoot to get that look.  Also, a layer of fat is useful for balancing boulders on one's chest during strongman contests, MDR.

I also love beards, as they are a prominent indicator of masculinity: - I have known Bilal since he was a little boy and he has had a beard as long as he has had facial hair.  He has always regarded this as an open indication of Christian masculinity, firstly because of how beards generally only appear on men and secondly given biblical verses on the subject.  Bilal has always regarded cutting off a man's beard without his consent as a very egregious act.  I am aware of an incident in school where a school bully attempted to cut his beard, which resulted in the bully getting a broken jaw (Bilal has always been generally a quiet and pensive character) and Bilal running away into some nearby forests and not turning up at home until after dark.  He is not normally argumentative, but I am aware of him having arguments with his school (over presentation issues) and his family (once they found out the beard was the result of his perception of it as an indicator of Christian masculinity).

I don't publish photos of Bilal or our son here because he has said he is not happy about it (I fully accept and appreciate his desire to maintain our family privacy), so I obviously need to talk about men in the public eye (or, at the very least, with online profiles) I perceive to be attractive (admittedly not as attractive as Bilal) in order to illustrate what I perceive to be real beauty in men.  One man I would like my magazine to do a feature on some day is Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson, a.k.a. "The Mountain" in "Game of Thrones" in spite of his tattoos and weather-beaten face (no surprise, as he is from Iceland, a country with extreme weather).  One Londoner I have come across online who shows non-white men how to look good in a beard is the Adventist Andrew Fuller.  However, apart from Bilal, the man I would most like my magazine to do a feature on is Englishman Eddie Hall, the first person to deadlift 500kg under strongman conditions (which nearly killed him).  Of men in the public eye, he is strong (pun intended) in every category: - muscular body (no six-pack present or needed), young-looking face and a great beard.

More pointless diatribes

As many readers will know, I have a particular dislike of the British journalist Zoë Williams, who is somewhat covetous of the effortless perfection that we Frenchwomen possess.  She wrote a review of Mireille Guiliano's French Women Don't Get Facelifts.

Nobody (save for our Lord and Saviour) is perfect, but I particularly like the way Mireille Guiliano proclaims the effortless perfection of French women.  In this book, she tells the world how French women age well, choosing natural beauty over horrid facelifts.

It is not as if we Frenchwomen don't know anything about ageing.  French women tend to rank very highly in life expectancy tables.  According to the OECD, in 2013, only Japan and Spain had higher female figures (pun intended).  Many will be aware of Jeanne Calment, who lived her whole life in Arles, a town not too far from Marseille.  Some of the stories she told were a bit silly, e.g. eating 1kg of chocolate a week.  Any Frenchwoman will tell you that if you did this, you would be incredibly fat, especially given the reduced physical activity that comes with advancing age (unless one is very diligent).  Mireille Guiliano recommends a one-square fix of chocolate each day.

Many Anglo-Saxon women choose to have cosmetic surgery after giving birth, e.g. to remove surplus skin, stretch marks etc.  Having just had a baby, I know that it can be a challenge to avoid the changes to one's tummy, but it can be done.  If you look after your body, you can keep your skin supple and able to cope with the changes pregnancy brings.

I note the bitchy comment about the supposed contradiction between not spending a lot on vitamins, but spending money on Bottega Veneta.  A Frenchwoman knows that nature is best when it comes to food and real natural stuff does not come at great cost.  However, when one buys fashion, one pays for the skill of the designer.  Granted, there are some deviations to this rule, but generally, you get what you pay for in the word of fashion.

I also disagree with the comment that watching one's weight and receiving admiring glances are a betrayal of feminism.  Readers will be aware of my desire to allow Bilal to build our family in the image of the Bible (with the husband as the head).  Zoë Williams would say the Bible oppresses women, to which I would say that she doesn't know about the very capable businesswoman in Proverbs 31, but anyway.  A Frenchwoman knows that it is possible to both look good and do well in life, be this one's career, business, politics etc.  Segolène Royal was, as Bilal would say, well buff (though far less so than me).  Granted, she lost to Nicolas Sarkozy, but in my opinion, that was because she promoted socialist policies which France did not need.  Mireille Guiliano was the CEO of Veuve Cliquot before her retirement and she wrote all these books showing the world how wonderful we Frenchwomen are.  Who says such women have betrayed the feminist revolution?

I always find Zoë Williams' francophobic diatribes funny and I particularly loved her rant in the last two paragraphs about Mireille Guiliano playing, as I understand things, a Borat-style naïve foreigner.  However, when I finished laughing, I thought to myself, why doesn't she just face up to the fact that we Frenchwomen know how to be beautiful and live life to the fullest?